This is the second draft of an entry I’d near enough all but completed before my version of office decided it wanted to crash and delete all my work. I’m usually very good at saving my work as I go, but ah well. This entry is a request from a very fun lady I have very recently become friendly with. I assure you the first version was loads better then this.
I often find that when it comes to appreciating the figures of women in all parts of daily life it’s the 3 usual suspects that are commented on and that’s legs, arse and tits. Now don’t get me wrong all of these have their perks of which I divulge more into shortly. What I think birds these days aint coming to realise, much to their disadvantage unfortunately, is that unlike men women are pretty much gorgeous in every way they come., in every shape and size.
Take the variation of tits for example, all are good! The small perky and firm ones you can squeeze entirely in your hand are just as fun as the big ones you can rest your head between or even fuck if you like. Although I’ve never been too much a fan of tit wanks, They just seem to be a bit of play you only get into solely for the reason that you have a massive pair of norks at your disposal… That and they just don’t do it for me. But with tits I find theirs too much emphasis on them having to be big and firm all the time. An A cup on a slim and slender bird is just as sexy as the hench D’s on a more full figured bit of brass. Even when the tits are out of proportion of the birds body, that ‘imperfection’ as it were is unique and as a result is sexy in itself.
Arses are always fun and provocative things. The chaotic huge bouncy ones are just as enticing as the very well defined tight ones. Personally I have a thing for slapping arses in everyday life. I’m gutted it’s a crime to be honest. Obviously I try to refrain from just giving firm, friendly smacks to every random broad I meet on the street. But to anyone who has been on the end of one of my spanks on the behind, this is one of my highest signs of affection.
Ofcourse the other glories of arses is that they have quite a few possibilities going for them. A lot of avenues to go down if you excuse the pun. The most popular ones of course is both eating and fucking them, and I reckon they are favored because of their gloriously high rating on the filth Richter scale. I’ve eaten arses that have tasted better then pussies, and the site of a bird loving taking it up the arse is nearly as good as it gets.
The two prime examples for legs indeed are the long lucky type that you can seemingly endlessly wrap around you. Then another favored variety is the wicked short thunder thighs on a much smaller bird. I never been too much into legs but I do preffer chunky over smooth… A lot more mass to bury your head in.
Then there are the other attributes of the bird that never get much of a look in. I am a big fan of bellies. They can be the most adorable feature on a brass. Spooning and playing with a nice tender tummy is my favorite laying down pass time.
My other actually more beloved area is feet, but this is more a specialist region. It can be quite hard to come across a lovely trotter with a cute drift of piggy’s, but when I do discover a perfect pair I can never leave them alone… Then ofcourse there are eyes, ears, mouths and nose’s but that’s another spectrum altogether.
But when I’m having a perv I like to focus on that extra bit of mystique, the area that don’t have cleavage and that the architecture of which can be admired by a tight fitting pair of jeans. Whilst most people may be taking in the tits, arse and thighs of yet another beautiful bird walking down the street. I for one am staring at their cunts.
My main love for fannies is not just that it’s the last thing revealed when getting friendly with a bird, although that is cool. Staring straight into those rosette lips is a sign that usually you are the right side of goal and you’re about to score. But there’s so much more fun to be had with the opportunity.
When you’re a few minutes into getting busy with your friend and you’re at the point where the shirts are off. You start to run your face down her body. Stick your tounge in her button. Run your mouth in between each of her lovely drum sticks and you get a wiff of the enticing pheromones emanating from her knickers. It’s just then that all the questions you silently asked yourself before hand are answered; does she shave? Will she taste sweet? How wet will she get? She’d tell me if she was ragging it at the moment wouldn’t she?
There’s a lot then to be praised about the brilliant pass time of chewing a minge. The filthy buzz that comes from the squels of pleasure from your friend as you greedily lap up the juices that she unloads on to your tongue and those satisfying faces she makes to indicate your job well done. My favorite accolade though has to be being forced to take a break because your munching has been that bit too relentless. Hell is an unresponsive bird getting noshed off. It’s happened to me on probably a couple of occasions and the experiences pretty much killed my hard on stone flaccid.
But it’s the endless varieties that twats come in that makes them my preference. The selection is huge one. From those less favored but fun meaty flapped pussies to those cute, prim and proper cunts with the clit sitting all regal at the top. Pubic hair aint an issue for me like it seems to be with some geezers. A friend of mine told me he didn’t like hairy muffs because they always smelt and tasted if piss. … I’ve never experienced this and I’ve had my fair share of furry meals. If anything the last pussy I ate that tasted of piss was my friends really lovely shaven cunt… She had just pissed on me though.
If I think about it, the last 3 cunts I’ve scoffed, played, chewed and fucked have all been completely varied. The last for example, was a slightly beardy and tasty specimen. I don’t remember much because I was unsportingly drunk, but I could fist it without an issue and fuck it with it still clinging to my cock. Before that was my mates really pretty, well shaven twat which was of the small lipped and textbook tight variety. A clit that was easy to aim for and was a pleasure to munch on for the brief time I did. And then the one previous to that was my my good friends hairy bush with charming flaps, lovely smell and a good reaction rate to any force placed on it. Again accommodatingly tight to fuck and most loved because of the bird it belongs to. All 3 cunt’s completely different but all an absolute privilege to play with.
There are certain stereotypes that plague the cunt gallery and they are the common myth about tight pussies’… Whats so great about tight pussies? I fucked a mouses ear hole of cunt once and it nearly shred my foreskin to ribbons. I once fucked a fanny that I could also fit 3 fingers in at the same time and it was a jolly boys outing of a shag. The glory of a tight hole is a myth. But then again I don’t cum from sex, so I may be redundant on this opinion. Also the stereotype of pussy tasting like fish… I must of eaten over 20 of them in my time, from a range of different nationalities and races… Never have I ever had the slightest aroma of sea life arise from that area.
I could write more about how the cunt is the all empowering embodiment, life giving orifices, that empowers the goddess that of the female form…. That aint my job… I’m a pervert. I like eating, fingering and fucking flange because it’s fun. Save your spiritual shit for the next meeting of cunt lovers that care.
All I know is that the fanny is the birdie on the 18th, the header in the 93rd minute, the nose over the line. It’s the final step in completing the goal of drawing the ties with a bird. It smells, looks and taste better then any other area of a birds body.
If you’re superficial enough to only fuck a size 8 with D tits with a cunt that taste of garlic and looks like spam on a barbershop floor you’re in for a bad time. When I’ve shagged size 23’s with b cup tits and cunt like a nats eye lid that tastes of apples I know I’ve scored the goal of the month.
Ladies, stop worrying about your dress size, stop worrying about how big your tits are, how round your arse looks. Those love handles are sexy and your face is more then likely very pretty. Look after your cunt, because in truth it’s the only thing we really care about at the end of the day.
Play me out Mozzer….